2008 Woodie Awards
Movie Reviews
Issue date: 3/4/04 Section: Arts & Entertainment
- Page 1 of 2 next >
Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen
By: Corey Kempf
1 fish
As a writer, I firmly believe that, if I'm going to grow an ego or gain any self-esteem from my work, I need to take a trip to a movie theater and hope I can catch a bad enough flick that will give me a pat on the back. Luckily, I picked "Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen."
The PG-rated film is about an overly optimistic 15-year-old named Lola, or Mary, (Lindsay Lohan) who begins anew at a New Jersey school by attempting to become the most popular girl in school. However, Carla (Alison Pill) has other plans. Lola and Carla battle it out until the ultimate test of popularity at the exclusive Sid Arthur farewell concert and the lead singer's (Adam Garcia) after party. When Lola doesn't get tickets, she is upset for two seconds then optimistically moves on to the party. Before she enters, the heartthrob, lead singer stumbles drunk out of the party, where she "saves his life" by escorting him to a diner ("Oh, my hero!"). Then, he comes to her aid later in the movie at Carla's party, therefore solidifying her as the most popular girl in school, telling her he's quit drinking to apparently become a pedophile. Hooray.
To be blunt, this movie falls flat on its face in every aspect. It's not funny. The storyline was too cute and perfect to be believable, and the writer and director collectively missed the fact that the guy she really fell for (no it wasn't the lead singer) had about two minutes of screen time. The acting was the only thing to save this movie from no fish.
The Passion of the Christ
by: Justin Lyman
5 fish
Gruesome and glorious, you would wonder how these words could fit into the same sentence let alone not referring to the new teen-slasher film. "The Passion" is a detailed portrayal of the last 12 hours of the life of Jesus of Nazareth. It has fallen under a lot of controversy for its violent depictions of Jesus' suffering on his final days.
By: Corey Kempf
1 fish
As a writer, I firmly believe that, if I'm going to grow an ego or gain any self-esteem from my work, I need to take a trip to a movie theater and hope I can catch a bad enough flick that will give me a pat on the back. Luckily, I picked "Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen."
The PG-rated film is about an overly optimistic 15-year-old named Lola, or Mary, (Lindsay Lohan) who begins anew at a New Jersey school by attempting to become the most popular girl in school. However, Carla (Alison Pill) has other plans. Lola and Carla battle it out until the ultimate test of popularity at the exclusive Sid Arthur farewell concert and the lead singer's (Adam Garcia) after party. When Lola doesn't get tickets, she is upset for two seconds then optimistically moves on to the party. Before she enters, the heartthrob, lead singer stumbles drunk out of the party, where she "saves his life" by escorting him to a diner ("Oh, my hero!"). Then, he comes to her aid later in the movie at Carla's party, therefore solidifying her as the most popular girl in school, telling her he's quit drinking to apparently become a pedophile. Hooray.
To be blunt, this movie falls flat on its face in every aspect. It's not funny. The storyline was too cute and perfect to be believable, and the writer and director collectively missed the fact that the guy she really fell for (no it wasn't the lead singer) had about two minutes of screen time. The acting was the only thing to save this movie from no fish.
The Passion of the Christ
by: Justin Lyman
5 fish
Gruesome and glorious, you would wonder how these words could fit into the same sentence let alone not referring to the new teen-slasher film. "The Passion" is a detailed portrayal of the last 12 hours of the life of Jesus of Nazareth. It has fallen under a lot of controversy for its violent depictions of Jesus' suffering on his final days.